Spring Break has officially started. Gus and Brandon are doing a cylcing trip for the two weeks we have and they stopped at my house overnight for some home cooking and to ride up a mountain this morning. Last night when we got into town I was promptly invited to my ex-ex girlfriend's dad's 50th birthday party. With nothing better to do, we decided to go ahead and go. My parents are good friends with these people, and so I didn't feel as awkward as a college student might at a gathering of 20 people with an average age of 57 or something. The party was pretty foreign to the three of us considering there was actually guest entertainment planned. We were to play some game called "Bunko" that apparently requires minimal skill to play and is a somewhat social game. The perfect selection considering the hosts had bought about $1000 worth of booze with the expressed intent of giving it away. Not a single bottle of Pancho Villa Tequila in the whole place, just classy stuff like Beefeater Gin and Gentleman Jack. Gus and I were tickled that it was also an open bar for the evening. After about 300 games of dice-rolling madness, the birthday gramps opened his presents. Most of them were gag gifts. I didn't get a lot of the jokes, because they were old people jokes, about not being able to get it up and stuff. There was actually one about the guy's wife sucking his balls or something, and both of their children (college-aged) were in the room. Pretty much all the guy got was joke stuff and then a "serious" present of some form of alcohol. Obviously all the guests interpreted this man's needs to be a short list of alcohol and sex, the first of which was in massive supply and the second of which I didn't stick around to figure out. Gus made an acute observaton that after the party these people were going to "fuck for about five minutes." It made sense to me, considering it was about 11pm and these folks were ready to call it quits.
Gus created an interesting bond with the birthday boy which mainly circulated around their affinity for strong drink. The long and short of it is that the guy got Gus wasted. Gus really wasn't that out of place because my ex-ex girlfriend was also equally wasted, and I figured it was more embarassing for the hosts to have their boozed up daughter propping herself up on the wall than for some guy with a beard to be stumbling around talking about bicycles.
After the party we headed back to my place to get into the hot tub. Brandon stayed sober and drove home, and I was quickly becoming clear-headed. Gus, on the other hand, was chocking me from the backseat the whole ride home. When we got out the car I made one request of him, and that was to act sober in front of my brothers. He said he could do that, then walked in the house, took his pants and boxers off in front of my bros, and began looking for his swimsuit. I guess it could have been worse, but showing your balss to two people you have never met before isn't exacly an ice-breaker. After the hot tub Gus almost walked into my parents room because he thought it was the shower, but I mangaged to steer him to his sleeping bag.
The man woke up this morning with a smile on his face and he said "that was the first day of Spring Break."
Hey all let me tell you, Lester Curvey knows how to have one heck of a party. We were there for four hours and it was like being in a tropical rainforest, except it was a boozeforest, and instead of poison dart frogs, the place is crawling with drunk old people. Drew tells it very well. If you're interested in continuing to follow the adventures of Gus and Brandon, check out the Spring Break on the Gus Bus blog!
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