Slow News Day

Wow, you know it's been a real fucking slow day at the ol' news depot when someone writes this drivel about the upcoming Super Bowl. Read it first and then come back. Ok you haven't? Fine--it's a Boston Herald sports columnist's opinion that the Pats are smarter and classier than Giants fans. Despite the fact that just writing that in a "legitimate" news source undercuts one's argument about class, she plows through some "data" about each team's fanbase. It's the sort of crap you expect the weekend before the Super Bowl when there's no game currently to write about.

But come on, does drinking Amstel Light really reflect on a populace's intelligence?

Really?

Ms. Heslam, couldn't you have called a local school to inquire about its upcoming soccer championships? How about the prospects of some of the graduating seniors that will be playing basketball in the area next year? I mean ANYTHING BUT THIS!

I'm going to sound like I'm coming down hard on women here, but what are you doing covering sports Ms. Heslam? You're a lot like our own Ann Killion, local female sports reporting egotistical demagogue. She couldn't find a way out of the 49ers locker room (euphemism) when they were good, but like every other fan in the bay area--come a few years of athletic recession--her pen is venomous and her jerseys burned.

My mind drifts to some of the sideline TV personalities like Michelle Tafoya. What are you doing there? Katie Couric you are not--we get it. But why are you unable to tell us more than "the coach said 'we have to play better.' back to you Al." I can't remember who said it at last week's Packers game, but they were talking about how the benches were cold. Had she known that only teams who have given up sit on benches, she would have known this fact was irrelevant. Tony Siragusa has insight. The guy's slamming down a pastrami sandwich and telling you about personnel changes on the offensive line that allowed for that previous opening. Let me paraphrase a mantra in sports, do something or get off the field.

This doesn't hold true to just women. There are plenty of men who need to get on the wagon too. They have some new color commentator for the Giants--I think they're grooming him as a replacement for either Kruk or Kuip--but the guy had to endure some new guy hazing like no other. He delivered his bullshit commentary from the platform the Giants built so they could record Barry breaking the HR record. And that place was windy as shit. It was entertaining to see him interview San Francisco's finest atop a platform with the wind threatening to blow them both off.

I applaud that.

Still, I can't help but think about how obsolete print media is. This includes print media reprinted online. That I actually read this article is a testament to the powers of the internet thought. The real irony is that I read it on Yahoo! whose stock has plummeted since their whole gambit at being a "web portal" has pretty much failed.

To bring it back to my original complaint, here's one of my favorite newspaper comics ever. It's in response to the nasty stuff the Eagles and their fans were saying before Carolina whomped 'em good in the playoffs.