The Scare Game

The Scare Game is easy to play and you play by yourself, so you can do it anywhere at any time.

Remove yourself from the modern conveniences of modernity (like lightbulbs, TV sets, self-cleaning ovens, and bilingual Tickle-Me Elmos) and ensure that you are somewhere that is sufficiently dark and uncomfortable. I must stress all these as equally important to the Scare Game, otherwise you won't achieve the goals of the game. The next part is easy: think something up to scare the shit out of yourself. I very much enjoy exercises in imagination, but people rarely toy with the dark side of their brain and instead spend all the day long fancying rainbows and unicorns. You will find that in the beginning it is hard to frighten yourself when you're TRYING to be scared, but keep it up. Think of the most terrifying thing you can. I will give you some of my favorite one-player Scare Game inventions:

FIVE, the fifth and Satanic Teletubby. I thought of Five when I was in high school and the Teletubbies were cool to second-graders and rave kids who sucked on pacifiers and wore big billowing pants. Five is black, unlike the bright colors of the other tubbies, and the symbol on his head is a pentogram instead of a fun circle or square. Five has the ability to "blink" in between this plane of existence and the fourth dimensional hell. Five has hollow white eyes and sharp, pointy teeth. Try walking alone through the woods and imagining Five blinking in and out of reality behind trees slowly approaching and no matter what direction you run he's always in front of you. Five is scary.

THE MOON MAN, a scary man from the moon. The moon man was thought up on nights when I would have to walk between my house and our shop to get various things. Sometimes my imagination would get out of control and I would imagine red glowing eyes staring at me from a distance. I don't know what the moon man looks like, I only know his eyes. They always watch me. No matter where I go, even in my dreams, they watch...

See how fun the Scare Game can be? It's even more fun if you get a group of friends together because more imagination means more fucked up terror for everyone to enjoy.