Flossing

I don't deny that flossing is important. Most of us (non-British) have been to the dentist and seen the pictures of the progression of gingivitus, which I recently learned is not the disease of being a redhead but is actually gum disease. I do however think that dentists can try a little too hard to get this point across.

My evidence: A few years ago I actually planned ahead and spent over a month flossing regularly before my appointment so I wouldn't have the usual embarrassment of them flossing me like I'm a paralyzed person and then awkwardly lying that I floss "a few times a week" as blood pours down my gums. As the woman flossed me this time she knew she had met her match, my gums were strong, conditioned, ready. A peeved look crossed her face as she produced the sharp metal scraping thing and FUCKING SKEWERED MY GUMS and then said, "oooh, you definitely need to floss more."

I'm currently flossing over a month out from my May 26 dentist appointment to test if they will again bleed me at all costs to scare me into flossing. Was the first time a fluke or am I about to break a motherfuckin' industry secret on the monstro blog? Time, errr, May 26 will tell.