Adventure Time

I have chosen to abandon all my previous goals for my life. I no longer wish to become an astronaut or dance in the Russian ballet. I have to chosen to become a professional adventurer. This came to me today at lunch when I was discussing a plan I concocted a few years ago when I was visiting Europe with my friends. We were in Nice, which is at the southern part of France that touches the Mediterranean Sea. Some random French guy told us that Africa was only 500 miles away (I can't remember the real distance) as we faced the ocean. I decided that this wasn't that daunting, and I saw that I could rent a jet-ski for about 30 Euro nearby. I thought it would be pretty cool to hop on the jet-ski with my backpack and an extra tank of gas and just head to Africa. People commented on the various threats involved in such an adventure; the possibility of storms and running out of water was among the most logical. A little bit of preparation is all that is required to make sure the adventure isn't hindered by those threats.
I quickly became excited at the prospect of adventuring as a full time job. If I pulled off the trip on the jet-ski, I could easily pull off more difficult trips. My grandest plan to date is to go around the world in a hovercraft. I would have to plan a fairly flat route, and crossing the Pacific would be a bitch, but it could be done. The next adventure would be to hike up one side of Mt. Everest, down the other side, and then raft into China until I came out in the Sea of Japan. The most deadly of my planned adventures has to be ice-sailing across Antarctica.
Since getting sponsors for these various adventures would be pretty difficult, I have decided to either 1) become a billionaire or 2) get a billionaire to finance me. I admit that 1 is much harder than 2, so I decided to pursue 2. I'm sure I could find some British billionaire who doesn't have anything better to do with his time than hunt in Africa, and it wouldn't be that hard for me to convince him to contribute his hunting expertise and fat wallet to adventuring around the world.
Since I could never abandon my passion for film, I would have a small film crew with me on all adventures, much like Steve Zissou from Wes Anderson's The Life Aquatic. I would then make a feature-length non-fictional film (rather than a documentary) about every single one of my adventures. They will be widely accepted by the critics but the public will find them a little too gritty.